The Brand New Library Book That Stressed Me Out!

karenalyse:

So great xD

Originally posted on Dysfunctional Literacy:

It looks harmless, maybe even inviting, but checking out a brand new library book can turn into a high stake situation!

It looks harmless, maybe even inviting, but checking out a brand new library book can turn into a high stake situation!

Opening an old library book is like being the first cop at the crime scene; you’re never sure what you’re going to find. You might find pages ripped, folded, or even torn out. Pages can be water damaged (at least we hope it’s water). Red stains can be blood or catsup or both. Brown stains can be… I don’t want to talk about it. And those tiny yellow-green pieces of debris that stick to the pages? Ugh. I wash my hands a lot after reading old library books.

But new library books are different. New library books are exciting. The books themselves are flawless and unblemished. There won’t be any water damage, or folded pages, or red stains, or green-yellow specks that stick to the pages. I might not…

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Boys and Girls.

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Boys.

Isn’t it always about boys?

The world is so intricately designed

and yet all girls truly care about are boys.

What would the world be like if that wasn’t all there was?

What would girls do if they weren’t obsessed with boys?

Maybe be more independent? Maybe be brave.

Maybe they would be proud of who they are.

Maybe they wouldn’t think twice if a boy looked their way.

Maybe they’d be more than they are now.

 

Girls.

Alternately, boys tend to think only about girls.

Girls are something to get. Something they have.

Something to flaunt. Something that they “acquired”.

Does that sound like a person? To me it sounds like an artifact.

A toy that can be used at their pleasure and tossed away when it gets old.

A thing that has little value once it gets old.

A thing that a boy may toss away when he is bored.

What if boys respected girls more?

What if girls were actually a special addition to a boy’s life?

 

Boys & Girls.

Together they can do great things.

Together they have great power.

Together they can get married.

Together they can fix their problems.

Together they can build a home.

Together they can council their friends equally.

Together they can dance.

Together they can sing.

Together they can do great and noble things.

 

So why?

Why do boys think of girls as objects? And why do girls think of boys as an escape?

Why do boys parade girls? And why do girls chase after boys?

Why do boys cast away girls when they get bored? Why would a girl run back to a boy who was so cruel to her?

Why do boys ignore girls until having one suits them? Why do girls think it is okay to be ignored?

Why do boys and girls use each other so wrongly?

 

Just some thoughts that I had on my mind. I’ve noticed these instances a lot more lately. I just don’t think we should truly hang our whole life on one other person. Girls shouldn’t plan their lives around a guy and drop everything just because he wanted to do something and guys shouldn’t drop everything just because the girl wanted to do something. It should be relatively equal and they should agree on the terms of their relationship. If they go to a dance and meet up there and the girl wants to talk to her friends because she hasn’t seen them and rarely ever does, then the guy should let her. He shouldn’t attempt to box her up and tell her she can ONLY spend the night with him and then when she doesn’t listen to him he shouldn’t leave without telling her. That is not the way things should happen. And guys shouldn’t feel suffocated by the girl. He should be able to be as free as the girl is. They should be on the same grounds in these areas.

Just some of my ideas and opinions. Tell me what you think! I actually am really interested!!

Fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse

Silver-Lined Heart (Write Alike Poem) from my Senior Year (2013-2014)

I’m for reckless abandon

and spontaneous celebrations of nothing at all,

like those times when no one is around you

and your automatic reaction is to dance around with no inhibitions!

See things you hate, things you despise,

student drivers who aren’t aware of their blinkers,

driving 5 miles per hour below the speed limit,

that’s all well and good.

And as far as sending text messages goes,

I guess you should.

it might just be a text that saves someone’s life,

brings true happiness to a friend or true love to adults.

But as far as what soothes me, what inspires and moves me,

honesty behooves me to tell you your rage doesn’t move me.

See, like the darkest of clouds my heart has a silver lining,

which does not harken to the loudest whining,

but beats and stirs and grows ever more

when I learn of the things you’re actually for.

That’s why I’m for leaps of faith, perfect love, and stories of friendship,

nothing but the music of successful long distance friendships.

For the fact of love being true

the way it is portrayed in love stories that we may just know it.

For movies when you need them,

and books when you need them.

And the wisdom to know the difference.

I’m for wishes upon stars, for friendships that endure,

for unconditional and divine and wise true love,

that it will always grow and burn throughout trials.

For dancing in the rain, and for the rain itself,

by which I mean the individual raindrops. Definitely for the raindrops.

Warm hoodies, and homemade chocolate shakes,

And stories written with your own imagination in the comfort of your home:

I’m for all of these.

So don’t waste my time and your curses on verses

about what you are against, despise, and abhor.

Tell me what inspires you, what fulfills and fires you,

put your precious pen to paper and tell me what you’re for!

 

~~~~

Fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse

Cruel as It Is, We Somehow Go On (Write Alike Short Story) from my Senior Year (2013-2014)

Sometimes the fandom life is cruel.

That is ultimately the fundamental lesson here, as fangirls wail, celebrities sleep calmly in hotels, and the angsty teens lie unclaimed in the rubble that once was real life.

Sometimes the characters fall and will not stop. Sometimes the writers turn evil and will not write. Sometimes the producers rise and smack the storyline like a fist. Sometimes the producers delay and split the story. And sometimes, the emotions rattle and heave and split in two.

Sometimes the fandom life is cruel.

And always, when it is, we do the same thing. We dig ourselves out. We weep and mourn, we recover and memorialize the fallen, we rebuild our hopes. And we go on. This is the price of being a fangirl. And also, arguably, the noblest fandoms.

Sometimes the fandom life is cruel, and you have no choice but to accept that as part of the bargain called fangirling. And when it is your turn to deal with it, you try.

But what if it’s always your turn?

Surely some hopeless, tear-streaked fangirl can be forgiven for thinking it is always her turn this evening, two minutes after the most angsty fandom in the world saw its episode airing delayed by the strongest force it has ever known, an evil producing monster. Surely, the rest of us watching from afar, experiencing tragedy and devastation from the comfort of desk chairs and living room couches, are tempted to believe the same thing.

Bad enough, fangirls are wretchedly poor. Bad enough they have a history of emotional instability and weakness, of being ignored by the major powers when it is not being exploited by them. Bad enough, all that, yet at the end of the day, those are disasters authored by the producers hands, by producers greed, producers corruption, producers economic predation.

Sometimes, though, you have to wonder if the producers themselves are not conspiring against these feisty little fangirls.

After 1995, when A&E’s Pride and Prejudice was aired, after 2005, when Doctor Who was revived and swept away over 500 fangirls, after 2006 when the mercy of Robin Hood helped over 2,000 souls, after 2010, when Sherlock aired only three episodes and Downton Abbey made a stir, followed by Merlin’s newfound fame which captured even more, after the double whammy of Spies of War and Bates Motel in 2013 gathered many more fangirls and destroyed social lives, through all that, comes this lifestyle – and an emotional toll psychologists cannot begin to even imagine. Perhaps as many as millions, they were saying on Wednesday.

Sometimes the fandom life is cruel. To crawl onto the couch, scanning for new episodes on Netflix, charting when shows are available, running from real life issues, is to understand this in a primal, personal way. It is to view a show that begins, “Long ago, in the time of dragons…” It is to create clever tumblr posts, donate your small funds, volunteer material and time and to fear, even in the waiting, that these gestures are small against the reality, inconsequential against the ache of a people  whose turn to fall never seems to end.

But what else are you going to do? As the playwright put it, your voice is too small to talk with producers. Even less have we the ability to answer the question that burns the moment: Why are the most vulnerable repeatedly assessed the highest price?

We are hamstrung by our own obsessions, so we can only do what we always do, only send money and hope. And watch, staggered by the courage it takes, as fangirls do what fangirls always do, the thing at which they have become so terribly practiced.

Dig out. Weep and mourn. Memorialize the fallen. Rebuild. Go on. And show the world once againa stubborn insistence on living, despite all the cruelties of the fandom life.

~~~~

Fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse

BYU-I Successfully Crossbreeds Corn Plant and Apricot Tree

Originally posted on The Squirrel:

Apricot Tree

Guest Post by Dalton Willard

REXBURG, Idaho— In what botanists around the world are calling a “nice surprise,” a research team comprised of BYU-Idaho faculty and students announced in a press conference yesterday the creation of Prunus redenbacunae, a new species of apricot that produces delicious popping corn in lieu of its usual succulent fruit.

Jennifer Christensen, a senior studying horticulture and one of the project leaders, told reporters that she could vividly recall the moment she realized the experiment had been successful.

“I came into the lab very early one morning and looked out the observation window, and what did I see? Popcorn, popping on the apricot tree!” Christensen said.

Kevin Arnold, Horticulture department head and senior advisor to the project, told reporters that the he believed the fruit-vegetable hybrid would fill a previously-unoccupied niche in the culinary field.

“There are many applications for this new species of Prunus armeniaca,”…

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LDS Church addresses rules regarding temple marriages

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Originally posted on FOX13Now.com:

SALT LAKE CITY – Officials with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints addressed their rules regarding temple marriages as an organization is requesting change.

Under current rules, LDS couples in the U.S. and Canada who have their marriage ceremony outside of one of the church’s temples are required to wait one year before they can be sealed in a temple.

The group Family First Weddings is pushing for a change to those rules, and they are encouraging LDS Church leaders to reexamine the policy.

LDS Church officials said they are constantly examining such issues and that a change in the future is possible, but they said they want to be clear they are not announcing an immediate change in policy.

“Church leaders are well aware of the issues involved and continue to examine them carefully,” LDS Church spokesman Cody Craynor said in response to the issue.

Under current…

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Best Reign Review I’ve EVER Seen!

So here is the link to the article if you care to go and read it there and read all of the stupid and great comments, however I will be copying the article here, but people need to remember that THIS IS NOT MY ARTICLE. I DID NOT WRITE THIS REVIEW. But I will be commenting on it. :D Now, enjoy the reading. It’s quite wonderful.
Reign Sacrifice review

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Reign S01E10: Sacrifice

Between the panicked pagan prayers, extremely gushy blood sound effects and the epic kiss between Mary and Bash (OVER A GRAVE!), I hereby dub “Sacrifice” the most Bashionate episode of Reign in World history. The show’s central love triangle is positioning itself to tear my heart in two like a spent roller coaster ticket by setting up Bash as a sensitive, loyal, and figuratively AND literally noble-ass dreamboat with progressive ideas about religious tolerance. Yes, Bash’s character was crystallized after weeks and weeks of Reign painting Francis as the Most Eligible Prince Ever, and now I don’t know who I’m rooting for. Are you conflicted? Are you staring at two T-shirts right now, one emblazoned with “Team Bash” the other ”Team Francis” and dissolving into sobs? Me too. It’s partly the Puffy Paint fumes. Let’s process this.

The “All ‘Bout Bash” episode started with an extremely Games of Thrones-y swordplay lesson, and Torrance Coombs was clearly loving life (I mean, who doesn’t love having swordplay as part of their day job) until Mary showed up and reminded him he should be sitting on a throne looking bored. Bash got sort of annoyed because, you know, all these EXPECTATIONS just because he’s going to be King and stuff… No, ’tis bewildering that Bash is still ANNOYED at being promoted to future King status because hello, ALL people did back in the day was try to become King. But then we quickly became sympathetic to Bash’s distaste for the whole noblesse oblige thing when we learned that a huge part of playing substitute to King Henry is presiding over 4H club debates.

All the fun was interrupted by the appearance of a tween with a beach ball shoved under her dress who gave the “What’s up” nod to Bash. Lola was like “SIDE BITCH.”

Then my fourth-grade teacher Mrs. Meznick showed up, called Bash a “handsome bastard,” and barreled toward, him with a Taxi Driver concealed blade up her sleeve. Thank goodness, because this meant Mary got to have a scene across from Catherine and let’s be real those are the best.

Catherine had transformed her house arrest into an excuse to redecorate. Mary demanded that all of Catherine’s comfort foods, floral arrangements, etc. be removed from her cell at once, and Catherine was like “WAIT NOT MY EYE CREAM” which made me laugh out loud, because as I’ve said before Megan Follows has basically managed to not age since Green Gables, I don’t know if it’s science or witchcraft or what, but all I could think was “What kind of eye cream, boo? Let’s get specific.” In terms of product placement, if they’d tucked some antiquated brand name in (“Not my Huiles d’Olay Code de Youth!”), that shizz would have gotten boughten.

Anyway. Despite Lola trying to stir the pot and create drama and drag everyone into her personal vortex of tragic nightmare relationships (I still see you Lola! I do NOT forgive you for defending your RAPIST BOYFRIEND, Lola!) Isobel turned out to actually not be Bash’s lover, but his half-cousin. Isobel had been falsely accused and dragged into court to reveal his connection to her father—a former TRAITOR! Obviously the half-nephew of a dead traitor could never be King! Their connection must be suppressed, and Isobel must flee the castle to have her baby in total seclusion! Mary was like, this sounds like a great excuse for a makeover.

Mary is secretly a budding stylist, yeah? Aside from her own mind-meltingly beautiful clothes, remember how she picked out that hot blue number for Olivia? Anyway, she went needlessly nuts on Isobel (wigs!) in preparation for their daring escape from the castle, popped on the most beautiful golden cape these eyes have ever seen, and left her ladies in charge of finding the evidence that would tie Catherine to the attempt on Bash’s life (and honor!) Yes, it’s an assignment that seems incredibly difficult to accomplish in the age before DNA identification, fingerprinting, microscopes, policework etc. but really what else do they have to do? Make yourselves useful, ladies.

The Waiting Braidies attempted to interrogate Catherine, which led to Catherine lining THEM up against a wall and giving them free readings like Miss Cleo has only ever dreamed of. She took down Kenna and Greer like mice under a lawnmower and she came for Lola, but, you know, it’s Lola: can’t shame the shameless. (LOLA I still see you for supporting your fiancee SEXUALLY ASSAULTING YOUR BEST FRIEND & QUEEN!! #NotForgivenNotForgotten!!) Anyway I really enjoyed Catherine’s snaps.

Meanwhile Bash and Mary were enjoying the most delicious golden woods a brocade cape ever matched, with Bash ready to unbosom the fact that he’s been in love with Mary since the pilot, obviously, but then Bash heard the snap of a twig under a squirrel’s foot as it ran away from a guard’s horse three miles away… and they had to flee to the Blood Wood!

There is nothing I love more than the Blood Wood. It is where we go for the very scariest and craziest parts of Reign, so OF COURSE the second they stopped in the Blood Wood, Isobel had to go into labor. It’s like the baby smelled all that conflict and was like “This will be a great plot point. Time to be born.”

Since Isobel couldn’t travel during delivery, Alec, Bash and Mary set up a rather elaborate and impressive roundhouse tent in approximately ten minutes and Isobel went very messily into labor. Mary stepped out for a breath of fresh air in the midst of the delivery and noticed a giant Blair Witch Mannikin hanging from a tree. And then she heard the frantic yammering of Witchy Pagan Rambling. They were all surrounded by chanting pagans! And then, the greatest horror of all: Bash, Alec, and Ysobel started CHANTING ALONG with the Witchy Pagan Prayer!! The call was coming from inside the house/the pagan prayer was coming from inside the roundhouse!

It never stops delighting me that Bash is so neck deep in crazy. And when Mary basically swooned at the extremely spooky heresy, Bash was like “#Tolerance & #respect” and Mary was like “THE PAGANS JUST CHOPPED A HEAD OFF A HORSE!!!!” Because while Mary’s New Age beliefs have expanded to embrace prophesy, she knows firsthand what it feels like to be menaced by pagans, and I think we can all agree horses are seriously special creatures and this animal in particular seemed like an innocent bystander.

But then a baby was born, and there was so much placenta. I don’t know if this was a subtle way to ensure that every teenage viewer will go out this weekend to buy a jumbo box of condoms, but this was by far the most graphic placentary I have seen on The CW. And it like snapped and gushed and blooshed and spurted! How much is birth like the movie Alien? You know what, don’t answer that.

Meanwhile Kenna was trying to get some reading done while Catherine basically played the dozens on her. Guys what do you think she was reading? Sex and the Single Girl orThe Rules?

However, Catherine’s nonstop taunting apparently reminded Kenna of something: They were living in an age without DNA identification, fingerprinting, microscopes, or police work. They didn’t need to find any evidence implicating Catherine, they could just make some shit up! They could straight-up forge some letters, borrow Catherine’s seal, and it would be an airtight case because that was the level of forensic science during the 16th century. Never stop being grateful for the present day, kids, never stop being grateful.

So Lola presented Catherine with the forged letters, a.k.a. a morally gray but utterly unimpeachable piece of planted evidence. Catherine was like “What is your deal?!” and Lola was like “I just don’t want someone corrupt in power I am basically a revolutionary this will rehabilitate my image a very little bit with some TV recappers maybe?” and I was like “NICE TRY LOLA BUT WE ALL KNOW WHAT YOU DID!!!”

Meanwhile, ACTUAL evidence was mounting that Mary might actually not know that much about delivering babies. I mean, when she lifted the blanket off a very white Isobel’s nether regions, it looked like she’d gotten that baby out using a cheese grater. And the blood wound foley sound effects that accompanied the sight… I mean, the sound of Mary lifting the blanket off Isobel sounded like someone trying to pull a Whoopie Cushion out of a mud flat. It was sort of unsettling. Bash was like “Isobel no worries you’ll be okay” and Mary was like “on opposite day” and Bash watched his half-cousin die right in front of his eyes—after she made him promise to look out for the Lil’est Pagan Baby.

First of all Torrance Coombs did some subtle reaction work here, kudos, it was heartfelt without being gratuitous. Second, the writing for this Bash-centric episode repeatedly enforced Bash as being protective of family and too passionate to lie smoothly. This is consistent with what we know of his character, very endearing, and it obviously makes him a great foil for Francis, who basically hates his parents and is a smooth operator. It’s also interesting that some of Mary’s largest insights into both suitors were communicated to Mary via close females—exes (Olivia), or in Bash’s case, his sort-of sister.

When Bash had to lay the body of his beloved sister-esque half-cousin before the Weaselly Dude in Cahoots With Queen Catherine, his struggle between personal integrity was shown, not told: Bash was clearly having a hard time concealing his feelings and “confessing” to Isobel’s murder. But it must be said that WOW that is a crazy thing to admit to. Basically Bash’s story was “This extremely small young lady resisted arrest so I killed her. Apparently by yanking out her uterus. J/K she had just given birth. Before I killed her. Whoops!” I mean damn, that’s less damaging to your reputation as a King than being slightly related to a pagan traitor? And then Cahoots was like “Well done, hopefully the baby will be eaten by wolves!” and it was just so ridiculously evil that I had no choice but to cackle out loud. I am sorry if any of you readers have lost loved ones to ravenous Fronch wolves, it just made me smile. Luckily the baby was alive, though branded by Isobel with a sacred pagan rune on her foot, I’m guessing either this symbol:

Or this:

So Bash is still techncially in danger of being revealed as the half-cousin of a notorious traitor? Still, neither looming danger nor a fresh grave could stop these two lovebirds from closing in on a big old wet n’ juicy kiss.  Mary brought an incredible flower arrangement to Isobel’s grave but Bash was like “Pagans prefer to cut themselves and bleed rather than do something grisly like let flowers wilt, ‘kay?” Sure Bash. I  just hope the cut on his palm from when he took Francis to the Blood Wood had healed. Or maybe he sliced the other hand? I’m betting Bash does not play a lot of piano. But then Mary also cut her hand and joined him in a pagan rite!

And then they kissed over a grave and it was like AHHH it’s no longer just an arranged marriage!! And also NOOOO poor Francis but also Yo Ho Ho Bash this is all you’ve ever wanted/needed!! I can get behind these two. And now that I’m sort of thinking about how genuine Bash is, how supportive of Mary he is, how he’s all about “I would do this just for you we’d be family”— whereas Francis to start with was all “We must think about our countries first and foremost”—I am equally convinced that Bash would be worse for Frahnnce and better for Mary. Whatever our emotional leanings, history/Wikapedia tells us that Mary will end up with Francis. While I don’t see a History Channel logo in the corner of the screen, this ain’t a documentary and so far the show has not let historical accuracy hamstring its efforts to entertain us silly. Still, I am fairly confident she will end up married to Francis; whether or not he’s the one she loves is currently open for debate.

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So, I was laughing as I read this whole thing. I couldn’t stop. Seriously. I really couldn’t. This is THE BEST review I’ve ever seen. No joke!!!

I really don’t know what else to say. The pictures in between sure cracked me up and then the way this author wrote out what she was saying really CRACKED. ME. UP. I loved it. She is amazing and I will definitely keep reading her reviews!!! Woop woop! Lily Sparks is a great person. Thank you for existing, lady!

Fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse