I thought we were more than just friends,
I thought I was more than a means to an end.
But then I thought you were almost mine,
When you stole my heart and left broken pieces behind.
Whatever let me think that we had a chance?
Whatever helped me see past your second glance?
It wasn’t me. It wasn’t me.
It was the person I wanted to be.
The world continued spinning,
Like nothing had ever mattered,
Your life continued enduring,
But mine? Mine was shattered.
Did I even have a shot at romance?
Looking back, I know there was no chance.
But what could have stopped me from hoping?
Only the knowledge of the betrayal coming.
Do you know what you did to me?
When you said that you cared?
When you said you would be there?
You promised me. You promised me.
But then you disappeared.
“I love you, too” you said,
“But as a friend”.
My world stopped,
My eyes glossed.
The tears began to fall,
The dark was a cover from all.
The movie was about “happyness”,
But where was the happy?
A few more times that day I almost broke outside,
I was broken inside and kept it hidden.
The idea that someone might see my pain,
That gave me more pain than I could bear.
The question of “what’s wrong?” would not be asked,
The idea that people might see my weakness scared me.
I settled for hiding, for fighting my tears,
Fighting my real emotions, fighting the fears.
They would not see it today,
No, not on a day that was supposed to be so good.
The beginning of a new month,
The beginning of the hurt.
The world wouldn’t see it,
They couldn’t understand.
I’ve hidden it away,
Until I actually understand.
I cannot fathom it right now,
But as my days go on I will.
One day him pushing me away,
Will be the best thing he did for me.
One day I may even thank him for it,
But not today, this day of all days.
No, not today;
Not now anyway.
This wasn’t what I wanted,
But it was what I got.
The world may be cruel,
But this is probably worthwhile.
I may not stop loving him,
But my life will go on.
He will still be my bestfriend,
Even if he doesn’t want me as his.
Fare thee well!