those days when you can only smile

The status I posted on FaceBook two nights ago:

“Those days when you can just smile through everything and nothing goes wrong and everything just keeps getting better and better? Those are the best. Cherish those days.

I just had one of those days.”

Now, this day was actually two days ago, but essentially I am still on a high from it.

I woke up and while I was definitely tired, I was glad to be awake. It was beautiful outside, I was working in my favorite department that day at work, and I got to talk to someone important to me.

Prior to work, I had a conversation with a good friend, we just talked about what was going on that day and then I went to work. As I was working I ended up being the Theater/Presentation Checker and I got to only do that all day. I helped out with organizing the box offices for the majority of the day and finally for the last 2 hours of my 8-9 hour shift I got to actually check theaters.

When I started checking theaters I went and had another conversation with my friend because they were at the theater. I found out how long they would be there and planned to come back later. We talked for like half an hour at that time and then both figured we needed to get back to work so we did.

I got off of work and went home, took a shower, and my brother asked me to come see a movie with him and our little brother. Of course, I agreed. On the way to the theater, I convinced my brother to stop at Kroger so I could get a Mexican Coke for my friend at the theater. He agreed to let me do that so we stopped there, I bought the coke, and we were back on the road to the theater.

When we arrived there we got our tickets and headed to concessions. While my brothers were at concessions I told them I would see them in a bit and headed over to where my friend was so I could give him his Coke (which was for his birthday).

I walked up to him and he was very involved in what he was doing right then so I jjust stood there and waited for him to notice me and finally when he did I was like “Here. This is for you.” and I held the Coke out to him. He got really excited and was genuinely happy and then he threw me off when he asked “Can I give you a hug?”

Of course, I said yes, I wasn’t about to turn down a hug. Then we stood there and started talking and before we both knew it we had been talking for like an hour and a half. It didn’t feel like it had been that long, but it was. I really enjoy his company, he’s a great friend and I’m positive we’ll still be friends for a while.

After that, I went and finished watching Star Wars with my brothers and finally we left and hung out at home. The day was literal perfection. I am not sure how much better you can get.

Like I said, I am still on a high from all that occurred that day.

If you have the opportunity to have a day like this, take advantage of it. They don’t come along all the time and may surprise you when they do or even disrupt your plans when they do. But they are so worth it.

As always, fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse

#donotbeafakefriend

I recently posted a FaceBook status that reads:

“It’s interesting when you realize just how many people you talked to/were friends with when you were younger that decided you were just another face in the crowd they could forget and now they have to interact with you. It always makes for some nice awkward encounters. Word to the wise? Maybe be a genuine friend or just don’t invest time in people. This way it won’t be awkward in the future. ‪#‎donotbeafakefriend‬

This is a good lesson for anyone to learn, but I am about to focus mainly on my faith. If no one knew this, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. With this comes a lot of close-knit community ties. We have a tighter community than most other religions. Especially with the fact that we don’t necessarily “choose” where we go to church, but rather go to a specific building based on where we live. Not only is it the building that an area is assigned to, but different sections of the area go to the church building at a specific time.

In Utah, this topic may not be a thing seeing as there truly is a church on almost every corner, but in Texas, this is absolutely a real occurrence. Especially when you reach cities that are even slightly more city than suburb. Even 45 minutes away from a major city deals with the tiny close-knit community that Mormons/LDS members are known for.

However, it’s not even home wards that we are dealing with here, it’s YSA’s (Young Single Adult wards and branches). If you thought the way we did Sunday services was strange, you’re gonna get a real kick out of this one. Outside of Utah and Idaho, we don’t really have multiple YSA’s for each stake. We, more than likely, have one.

And this brings me back to my main point. Do not be a fake friend.

When we are younger, we have the chance to meet people in our area and age group in the church at various activities and we 0ften become friends with many people this way. The only caveat here is that many young members of the church will simply tolerate people that they wouldn’t want to be friends with outside of these activities. Thus, when college hits everyone goes their separate ways, UNLESS they continue to live in the same city that they grew up in.

This is because they now begin going to the YSA branch/ward in their area and now have to encounter those people again on a regular occurrence–even more than they had before as children.

This is not an issue for everyone, but this can be one for many because they have chosen to ignore those they “befriended” as young children because they, at the time or later, thought they were “too churchy”, “too weird”, “not cool enough”, or even “merely tolerable”. (This list doesn’t end. People have endless reasons for dropping someone and ignoring them completely–This isn’t only in the LDS community. It happens with EVERYONE.)

What drove me to write about this is that I now have an assignment where I have to interact with one of these “friends” from my childhood each month who I suppose was never truly a friend. It wouldn’t be weird if the person in question hadn’t continually ignored me as an adult and pretended like I didn’t exist. However, because they did this it will make interacting with them that much more awkward. I had made the effort to reach out to them as I was at school and such and they, countless times, ignored me.

Y’all may be thinking “oh she’s just butthurt that this happened to her…”, “she shouldn’t have tried…”, “only she would be affected by this…”, “it’s all in her head…”, “this isn’t really happpening to her…” but all of those phrases are so far from the truth.

If the person in question hadn’t been friends with me when we were young children there would be no issue and this would be another instance where I get to meet a new person, but because I’ve known them for over 15 years, have known what they went through, and have seen how far they’ve come without them even thinking that I might be a friend, this is going to be awkward. And it probably won’t be awkward just for me.

I can guarantee you that the second they realize that I was one of the people they knew as a child whom they often spent time with they will feel the awkwardness.

This is not a post where I am asking you to pity me or help me wallow in my sorrow, but this is a post where I am asking you to please, PLEASE, please be genuine. I cannot express how much I hope everyone takes this and decides to be a genuine individual and friend. It is hard to realize how important it is when we are young, but as we grow older we need to recognize that nobody has time for fake friends. Nobody has time to be fake. No one has time to even think about being fake. Genuine is where it’s at. This is the only type of friend ANYONE should be. And the only type of friend that I intend to be. I will interact with this person just as I would with any of my close friends. I will continue to love them and reach out to them, no matter what because I truly care about them and I hope, more than anything, that I can make a difference in their life.

 

These are my thoughts on this topic, I hope y’all have thoughts to share with me as well because I love to hear stories and comments from people.

Fare thee well!!

Karen Alyse

Rant on plans (how once they are made and agreed on, there should be no thoughts on changing them drastically)

So, this summer has been an insane amount of making plans and then changing them.

Some of these changes no one could have controlled so those were okay, such as:

-my boyfriend not being able to visit this past week like he was originally going to

or

-a very secret trip I am taking that basically only my family knows about, etc.

However, there was one plan that could have and probably should have stayed in tact because both parties did have control over it.

And this plan would be the trip my sister and I were planning to go see Todrick Hall and IM5 in their Twerk du Soleil concert.

The reason this trip was even thought up was because Todrick and IM5 have 3 concerts occurring in Texas, starting Thursday, July 10th in San Antonio, continuing on to Houston on the 11th, and then continuing to Dallas on the 12th. Now, I live in the Dallas area so you might be wondering why I would even ponder going to another concert when that one is the closest one. Well, the answer is simple, really. My flight for my secret trip is that day. I leave early that morning and therefore will not be in town that night for the 7:30 concert that Toddy and IM5 are going to be putting on. I was more than disappointed when I found this out. Honest. I wanted to go so badly. I still want to go. SO BADLY. But I cannot.

You see, my sister and I decided that since I wouldn’t be in town that evening we could possibly see about driving down to San Antonio the morning of Toddy’s SA concert, be there a few hours before the concert, get ready for it and go, and then stay in SA for that night and drive back to the Dallas area the next morning. It was a great plan when we thought it up because I have a car, we both have a decent amount of money that we could use on this trip, and it fit into our schedule (well, MY schedule).

But then we told our mom about it. She didn’t like the plan at all. She thought it was a bad idea because it would be too expensive and we would be alone, and we don’t know the city, and it would be such a short trip, and too much driving for me, etc. the list might’ve been endless, I’m not sure. But I did understand her qualms so my sister and I decided we probably wouldn’t be able to go, unless of course we found someone who could go with us, but that wasn’t super likely. However I did decide I was going to at least try, so I checked with my cousin who used to live in SA and she couldn’t do it. That was when it became real that we probably wouldn’t get to go so I just stopped looking for someone to go with us because I figured we just wouldn’t be able to go.

Then I went to this Independence Day celebration and my brother and my sister-in-law totally agree to going with my sister and I and we were so excited that we would get to go to the concert. We told our parents and they agreed that we could go. And then 3 days later, after the plans have been set I get a call from my brother saying that his wife wants to spend the weekend in SA. My flight Saturday morning is out of Dallas. If we stay the weekend I miss that flight. And the way my brother wanted me to do it, my trip would go up another $150 for changing where I would depart from. I simply could not afford that. So essentially, my sister in law decided the SA trip wouldn’t happen. But it could have happened if the plans had stayed the way my sister and I had originally planned it out.

It bugs me when plans change this drastically, mainly because people plan on things like this and then they just don’t get to go through with them because people who had agreed to the original plan wanted to change it. Like no. These aren’t your plans to change in the first place. Stop. Stop right now. Stop before you hurt yourself and others.

So that’s my view on the whole changing plans thing: You shouldn’t agree to something if you don’t intend on staying true to the original plan. Do not think that plans can change just because it doesn’t fit exactly how you feel it should be.

In other plans news:

-My boyfriend is planning on visiting me for my birthday instead now ❤

-My secret trip will soon be something I’ll be able to talk about 😉

-My New York church trip is going to be great AND I might get to see my boyfriend during that trip as well 😉

There is a LOT of traveling in my future. This is insane. But It’s exciting too. I cannot wait to get to begin this new chapter of my life. ❤ Woohoo college!

Well, fare thee well!!!

Karen Alyse